I am a firstborn, Type A personality. I love schedules, structure, order, predictability, planning, making lists and crossing things off those lists. So it may surprise some to know that I am not anywhere near a “perfect” Mom. Yes, my kids eat sweets and watch TV. Sometimes when my 3-year-old wants Honey Nut Cheerios for the 3rd time in the same day, I let him have them. Other times, I allow my 3-year-old and 10-month-old sons to wrestle a little with each other until (inevitably) someone cries. It seems like my house is in perpetual chaos – I do not pick up the toys in my living room every day. (gasp!) I hate doing dishes, even though I have a dishwasher. I dread folding laundry, and I almost always have at least two baskets of clean clothes sitting and wrinkling for a couple days before I muster up enough energy to get them folded and put away. I almost never make my bed and on some occasions I find my kitchen utensils in the bath tub.
But before you judge me, here’s a few things I do “right” …
- I pray with and for my children on a daily basis, and talk to them about God
- I read stories to my kids before bed and before nap time … Bible stories, yes, but also Clifford, Berenstain Bears, Curious George and all those fun Sandra Boynton board books
- My family faithfully attends church every Sunday morning and Wednesday night
- I hang my son’s artwork on the refrigerator, and put the dandelions he picks in a vase
- I am assembling a shoe box or two to send to Operation Christmas Child with my kids, so they will understand what it means to give to others in need (www.samaritanspurse.org/occ)
- I work with my 3-year-old in memorizing his Bible verses, along with his numbers, colors, shapes and ABC’s
- I seek and find “mommy time” in Bible studies and my MOPS group – to help rejuvenate my spirit, find encouragement and support, and get advice from other godly women in the same season of life
- I consistently (constantly?! Haha) discipline my 3-year-old when he is defiant, disrespectful or unloving toward others
- I tell my children I love them at least twice a day
- I am not afraid to be silly with my kids, and love to laugh with them
- I clean my house when it’s dirty, not when I’ve scheduled a cleaning day J - and I use those moments to teach my children about how the world does not revolve around them
- I stick to a flexible schedule for my kids meals and naptimes so that they can find a measure of security in knowing what to expect each day
- I pay babysitters (even when it hurts) for date nights with my husband, so that the foundation of our family remains strong (and mom and dad stay sane!)
No mother is perfect. We read parenting books, talk/vent/cry to other moms, search the Internet and rack our brains for creative parenting ideas when it seems like nothing is working. I firmly believe that motherhood is about knowing your child and yourself. It’s about trial-and-error, and deciding what your family’s preferences and values are – not the mom down the street. It’s about trying (really hard) not to compare yourself/your kid/your messy house with anyone else’s. And it’s definitely not about doing it all on your own – we were designed to exist in community. By relying on God, family and other young moms, we draw upon the resources offered by ‘the village’ to raise our children to be honest, respectful citizens, destined to make a positive contribution to the world around them.
So maybe tonight I’ll pick up those toys or fold that laundry … or maybe I’ll just take a bubble bath and read a (parenting) magazine. J
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